Have you ever felt like there were certain expectations that were non-negotiable and others that continuously transform depending on the season of life you are in?
Expectations come in the package of responsibility in life. They can challenge us and cause us to question who we are at times and who we wish to be. Expectations have a knack for making ourselves honest and for bringing out the best and revealing the worst in ourselves. It causes us to look deeper into our character and to force ourselves to push ourselves even harder than we are at that moment challenging our character and our teachability. Expectations are a vital part of life without them we would all be lazy and we would not be achieving what God has for us.
Self expectations are those that we put upon ourselves in order to reach goals and continually transform into a "better" person, someone who is stronger and more successful. These expectations are ones we believe we can achieve. We put "limits" on ourselves and expect ourselves to achieve a certain amount of success and reach the goals we set. Due to the fact that we are biased, we limit ourselves without even being aware of it by having the same expectations as others have for themselves especially family for it is what we are comfortable with and it is what we know. We also limit ourselves when we are too realistic for we lack the perspective of the full picture. We just see what we know right now. Others see our potential. They see who we could be if we just worked hard and pushed for more.
We all have expectations for ourselves that are non-negotaible like showering regularly, having a job or income, respect for self and others, and following the rules and working hard to accomplish tasks or goals. Others also have expectations for our work ethic, self-discipline, character, goals and future aspirations. It seems that when people care about you they want to invest all their opinions of who you should be and what you should be doing for they believe they know how it is done. I am not saying that is right or wrong you can be the judge of that. However, I am saying that people do expect that when they invest into you that you will take what they are saying and apply it to your life. The issue is we do not always agree to what others say about how we should live OUR lives. So what to do?
We all clearly have different definitions of what success is in our lives and what will bring happiness and satisfaction to us. We all continue to set goals for ourselves, and do whatever we can to feel satisfied at the end of the day. What do we do when we feel satisfied with where we are but others see differently? Do we challenge oursleves and push ourselves to the limit and try to achieve more to see because they could be right? Or do we think on it and come back to it later when we are more prepared to change and face that expectation?
I struggle with pushing myself according to others expectations for sometimes my expectationsof myself don't line up with the expectations of others. Does that make my expectations for myself at this time any less significant? I believe that we set the standards for our life and we can depend on God's standards for his are the only ones that matter in the end. We can choose to live according to the Word of God and the standards that God has for us and trust him to help us meet the expectations of life or we can go it alone and struggle with failure after failure and achieving less than what he wants for us. To be honest its a no brainer but when it actually comes to doing it sometimes we'd rather just wait for a better time to change and face the next challenge at a later date. Does pressure from others really inspire us to change? Or is it our self expectations and expectations of others meeting at a compromise?
What are your thoughts? I would love to hear them.
"Your expectations opens or closes the doors of your supply, If you expect grand things, and work honestly for them, they will come to you, your supply will correspond with your expectation." - Marden, Orison Swett
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It’s and interesting topic. You almost need to stop and consider where the expectation comes from. Like advice everyone has certain expectations they put on themselves and others. Where do both these things come from? Experience! So when asking is a person’s expectation reasonable you need to consider the source. If it’s from personal experience and the person has a great deal of successes in that area you might want to consider it. Of course it doesn’t always mean its right for you. That’s the advantage to praying and digging into the Word. Making sure it’s a good fit for where you are in life. Even people with the best of intentions can have unrealistic expectations. In many cases its not because its wrong but because as I said you need to make sure its right for your situation.
ReplyDeleteI like how you mentioned that we are sometimes unaware of the limits we set on ourselves. Some times it’s our own experiences that work against us. We have already predetermined what we can and can’t do based on the circumstances found in our past. It’s a sad truth. We constantly learn and grow yet we often neglect the change in order to protect ourselves. We try to play it safe, try to be relaxed not stepping out of our comfort zone. We miss our potential because were stuck on circumstances and unable to see how easy it is to overcome.
All human wisdom aside…Pray read, your bible, listen! I know we’ve heard it a thousand times but God will guide you. As you grow in Him you will realize just how limitless He is. Have an expectation that He is more than enough. Have the expectation that He has provided everything for every area of your life. Have the expectation that He is the friend that sticks closer than a brother. I could go on but dig in the Bible yourself! Remind yourself daily who you are in Christ and watch as your expectations and the expectations of others are surpassed. Its not in your ability, its not about your strength but in the strength of someone who made a way for you. His yolk is easy his burden is light.