Living Within The Fog

July 10, 2013

I just found not too long ago (less than a week) that I was not accepted into the Honors program for my last year of University. I have the grades and experience but I was just among 10 that were not accepted because there weren't enough teachers to teach the program that I wanted to take. My education upto this point has not left me with many open doors. I had a plan and I believed that that I would have one year left and then I would graduate and look for a job. The problem with life is that plans rarely end up unfolding like that. Now I am a 3rd year soon to be graduate and I am looking ahead and all I see is fog. I am surrounded by uncertainty, and doubt and in the midst of it, a still voice calling me forward asking me to trust and keep moving. 

Has anyone else been here? Living among the fog that clouds my view. I feel I am living with no clear vision of where I am going. The voices in my head mocking me as I continue through the fog blind. "The Lord is with me," David said as he was facing his darkest moments. He was brave and courageous yet throughout Psalms it clearly shows that David had some weak moments and felt as though he was drowning and full of anguish and loneliness combined with confusion and exhaustion. Moses was probably thinking when he was staring at an ocean, "No where to go but through, somehow? He must have asked,"Now what? A million times over. God made a way. 

God provides and I know this from all the times he has provided for me. Yet I still somehow, forget that through the fog he remains beside me, maybe silent, but still beside me. He won't let me be led astray. He won't stop providing. The goal at this point is to keep moving, keep living and trusting that as I remain faithful he will lead me and show me his ways. 

So I may move slower because I am blind but I won't stop despite the obstacles I have yet to encounter. I know He will not fail me. 

Until then I will take heart the lyrics of this song and hold fast.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GIpIHfZ88PM&feature=endscreen&NR=1